IC CONTACT - DRIFT FLEET

[wolfuncaged]

FROM: SUBJECT: KIRK Fenris? It's me. Can I come in? MARIAN/CLOUD Meanacing DORIAN Well, I wasn't certain what to expect... JUSTICE You seem to have escaped the planet unharmed. RIONA You know, when someone is three sheets to the wind and suggests a threesome... RIONA Fenris! It feels like ages since we've spoken. KIRK ACTION MARIAN Fenriiiiis ADALWOLFE please tell me you didn't sleep with Isabela too ANDERS :3 MARIAN This will do KIRK Can we talk? MARIAN You're a mess, Marian. ADALWOLFE Special delivery! ANDERS Maybe it will help with your face. HAWKE Fenris? You there? VARRIC Don't-- don't do anything. OCTAVIA Hey, Fenris ELIZE Fenris? JOVE ACTION STEVEN fenrisssssssssssssssssssssssss ROBIN Listen, Fenris, I know you don't give a shit about me, but-- FELIX Fenris, I apologize for contacting you in this way, but I was wondering... JOVE SO ABOUT COLE JOVE STRAWBERRIES

TO: SUBJECT: KIRK About Anders KIRK Kirk wakes KIRK Kirk? Can we speak? MARIAN Where are you? We need to speak. KIRK You wish to speak HAWKE We need to speak VARRIC Varric. Varric. Varric wake up. JOVE Jove. May I have a moment of your time? JOVE Can we speak? Are you busy? HAWKE Is there anywhere on this blighted hole we can find any decent alcohol? JOVE I was spiteful and angry to you, and I owe you an apology. HAWKE Hawke. Did you know the Inquisition have a demon? VARRIC There is something I need to tell you.

inboxcode by cawaii

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Action 5evar

[wolfehawke]

[He practically squirms under Fenris' baleful gaze, the smile on his face turning strained and uncomfortable like being told to pose for a photo well before the photographer is ready. His cheeks hurt. When Fenris finally speaks, Hawke almost breathes a sigh of relief. Of course what Fenris says puts him right back to squirming.]

What? No! It has nothing to do with helping your face.

[Maker damn you, Anders.]

I mean. Wait.

[That didn't sound right. Let's try again.]

It's a peace offering. The wine, too. Best Crowley had in stock. I would have gotten something on planet but it all looked a bit thin and I know you prefer wine over beer or ale.

[At least he thinks he remembers that.]

At least I thought so. Tell me if I'm wrong.

[Unless Fenris had been drinking all of Denarius' left behind stock out of spite. Which is possible. Andraste's tits he's cocking this up so badly already.]

Either way, I just thought it would be. Um. A nice... gesture...

[He's going to get shoved out of an airlock, isn't he.]

yeeeeesss

[wolfuncaged]

[Fenris continues to stare at him, impassive and steady. Not a hint of emotion creeping out to show what the elf is thinking, or feeling. Perhaps he takes a little joy in making Adalwolfe squirm. Perhaps he doesn't. It's impossible to tell.

Still, he listens. And when Adalwolfe stops talking he folds his arms ]

Why? Why bring me gifts? I was under the impression you did not care much for garnering my company or my attention.

[wolfehawke]

That was a mistake, Fenris.

[Something sober goes into his tone. He's still apologetic, but there's a weight to it. All due gravitas to how their friendship not only ended, but how it never really had a chance to begin. Not in Thedas, anyway, but here...]

I should have trusted you. I should have gotten to know you. Marian called you family, and to think I never allowed that then...

[He meets the elf's eyes, his own not searching for compassion but pleading for understanding quietly under an even tone and serious expression.]

I want to mend what I ruined by not giving it a chance. The only way I can see to do that is to start over.

[wolfuncaged]

And you plan to do this with wine and slugs?

[It came out before he could think about it, and he takes in a slow, steady inhale, and an equally steady exhale. Breathe. In and out. In and out.

Once he finds a centre of calm again, he looks back to Adalwolfe. He hasn't eased an inch, but he doesn't look ready to push the man out of the airlock, either. He can take his wins where he can get them. ]

So you are going to attempt to fix your mistakes with me, while your own Fenris remains dead. It would change nothing, back home for you. The me in your Thedas will remain just as dead.

[wolfehawke]

This is the closest I can get.

[It's not quiet. It's stern, heavy, and Hawke doesn't look away from Fenris' face as he says it.]

I would have fought by his side, but he never knew it. I didn't let him know it. And damnit I know you're no more him than I am Marian but this is the only thing I can do. Yes he's dead. I hate that it turned out that way, I blame myself for it entirely because I didn't ever tell him. That even as a mage, something he - you - abhor, I would still have his back. I should have said it from the start, then maybe he wouldn't have raised a sword to me.

[He runs one hand down his face, the wine bottle dangling from his hand with the slug stuck to it placidly. There are dark circles under Hawke's eyes, a haggard hallow to his cheeks that the smiling had hidden before, but not now. As much as he's tried to compartmentalize, tried to face forward and keep marching, he's worked himself to the bone already earning enough for gifts, for these little peace offerings, for anything that keeps him from sleeping too long or being too much alone with his thoughts.

Not that he's been able to outrun them.

So he faces them head on, in reckless fashion true to form. With the best of intentions and so little of a plan.]

I can't fix it, Fenris. Not for him, I know that. What I want is to not repeat history.

[wolfuncaged]

[Fenris watches him impassively. Concern from him is something earned, along with respect and affection. Not even Hawkes from other worlds get this instantly, but learning what he has from Adalwolfe has set the man back further than most usually get. ]

You cannot win me over with gifts and words. Perhaps if you'd bothered to know me better, you would be aware of that.

[His tone is level, but the words are sharp. They're designed to hurt. He doesn't shift his stance, continuing to glare up at the other man. ]

If you wish to prove that you want to make a change, show it in your actions. Such things do not med themselves overnight, and if you think they will, you will find you are proving nothing to anyone but yourself.

[wolfehawke]

I'm not-!

[His voice raises and he squashes it quickly, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly. It doesn't do to get frustrated, not with this. Not when Fenris has every right to think this way of him after what he was told. Another thing he should have just kept to himself. Or it could have blown up in his face later and been worse? He doesn't know, but he has enough to regret without giving his actions a third, fourth, and fifth guess beyond the second.]

I'm not assuming I can just walk in here with gifts and expect us to be suddenly be best friends. What this is, is a start. It's supposed to be a symbol of my intention to get to know you. Just to open a door, not move right in.

[wolfuncaged]

[Fenris watches him in silence, debates even slamming the door in his face. That would bring some relief to all of this, but it wouldn't do much good in the long run. They're going to be stuck on these ships for the foreseeable future, after all. Even Fenris can't expend his energy loathing someone every second of the day.

...Not so much any more, anyway. At least living away from Thedas has done wonders with his patience. Small mercies.

After what feels like an eternity of staring, he reaches out to take the wine and the slug. ]

Fine. A start.

[wolfehawke]

[Fenris finally reaches for the bottle and Hawke feels like he can breathe again, at least a little. A start, like he said. Not leaps and bounds, but a start. It's all he can ask for.]

Enjoy it in good health. I can get more, if you like it. Or try anyway.

[That one had cost him a pretty penny, but it's worth it, if it can keep the door open even a crack. Maybe at some point, they can get to where they can actually share a bottle and talk.

He won't count that particular chicken just yet.]

And thank you. For the chance.

[wolfuncaged]

Hnh.

[That could be a good noise or a bad noise. It's always really hard to tell with Fenris. Maybe a mix of the two? Still, he takes the wine and the slug and that is a start. A small one, but a start it is. He still looks as tense as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs, but he's not over the edge with rage, either. ]

Now comes seeing if I regret that or not.

[wolfehawke]

You won't.

[It's more a promise than any sort of confident declaration, trying to reiterate to Fenris without repeating himself that he is trying. That he's come to Fenris on the proverbial bent knee to try and make things as right as is possible.

Of course now he's awkwardly still standing outside of Fenris' door not sure what to say. He's certain any suggestion that they do share and talk will be met with a sneer so he doesn't ask, even if he wants to.

He shuffles his feet a bit, clearing his throat, waiting for Fenris to make the next move, which is a weird feeling. Usually Hawke's the one to move first in all cases.]

[wolfuncaged]

Hnh.

[Fenris turns to go back into his room, ableit with the slug and the wine, content to leave it at that. Still, he pauses, looking over his shoulder at Adalwolfe. ]

Until next time, then.

[He doesn't offer any suggestion when 'next time' will be, nor does he say with with anything but his usual dour expression, but it's a shimmer of something. The tiniest slivers of hope. He heads back inside and closes the door. Bye Wolfe, byyye. ]